After a short walk early this morning, Ryan and I went at this new burger place to have coffee and breakfast. Since it was early and technically still a holiday, the ambiance was clear and yeah… NEW! We were the only diners actually. The outside environment were free from all the vehicles and pedestrian. As I sip my coffee … in a peace and quiet environment I was in, I had a bit of time to reflect and think. I wondered how I would like to spend my 2019.
With a clear mind and an empty plate, these thoughts hit me:
I’m the type of person who worries about a lot of things. I tend to overthink about my family, their health, my health, my finances, my work, everything … you name it. I even worry on people or things that doesn’t concerns me at all. And what did I gained? nothing but stress. The inevitable still and will happen.
I worried that I will lost my parents someday my whole life …and then, my Father died almost two years ago. I used to worry that Ryan and I will not be having a child, and so we did things, we spent on tests, consultation fees, medical procedures and more than you can imagine. This year, we decided to give it to the Lord. If he will bless us with a child someday, we will be grateful. If not, maybe he wanted us to do something more noble. Things will fall into their rightful places weather we worry about it or not. This year, I will focus to the Present and Stop worrying about the Future.
I’m a beauty blogger, of course I have a lot of skincare and makeup stuff so that I can blog/vlog and share my thoughts about them. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that I have to hoard all the time. I will start by selling my pre-loved items and use the income to buy new ones. I can also strengthen my partnerships with brands and so on.
Since I was little, traveling makes me feels good .. I got it from my Tatay. This past year, I noticed that I have been spending my free days on the mall, spending on stuff out of impulse, watching movies that I can watch at home, etcetera. I forgot how to go out to the real world and explore. I will do more of it this year, tasting new, exotic and bizarre food where my foot takes me.
I’m not getting any younger, soon I will not be able to do things as I please. This year I will trek mountains again and do things that I haven’t tried before. I will do whatever I like and will not hold back. I will live only once so its time to make the best out of it. I might have a tattoo! 🙂
Blogging/Vlogging is my outlet for all the thoughts circling my mind. I was born curious about things. My parents used to say that I was a curious kid who asked a lot of questions and loved to talk. That’s why they called me “Chichay” back then because I just don’t stop talking. As long as I have something to share, I will continue writing and speaking.
I hate being judged by people for as long as I can remember. With this, my actions from the past became limited because I was always worried on how other people might say or think of me. Right now, I’m so over that crap thinking. Now, I will be me. I will not limit myself anymore to do things just to please others. I will do things my way as long as it will make me satisfied and happy.
This is the second time in my life that I felt very clear on the things that I want. After I got home, I went straight to this computer and started writing this post while my thinking is still fresh and free from other matters.
Happy New Year Everyone! Let us enjoy the magic of beginnings. May God Bless Us All!